I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: The most complex and perplexing questions of the universe can always be answered at the library. Here is a story to prove it. Recently my niece Kelly purchased an unassembled entertainment center. When two women embark on a construction project, it is a very intricate and multifaceted process. No woman will approach the task in the same manner, so each participant must observe and gauge the other’s building expertise and methodology. A man’s technique is always the same: Rip open the box, throw away the instructions, and get out the power tools. When I arrived at Kelly’s apartment to tackle the massive undertaking, she had all the parts laid out and the instructions unfolded. First we addressed that age-old mystery: Why did she buy it unassembled? Once we accepted the inevitable, we read the directions. We looked at each other with puzzled expressions and read them again. Still perplexed, we opened the bag of screws, nuts and bolts, brackets, etc. We needed two screwdrivers (the instructions strictly prohibited the use of power tools.) See, we were already ahead of the men’s system. Kelly retrieved the appropriate tools and we followed the directions, attaching Unit A to Unit G and Shelf C to Sidewall F. Early on we learned that once I got down on the floor, I was not getting back up without a hoist. It was just too slow and painful, and would add another hour to the project. Eventually I did the standing stuff and Kelly did the "on the floor" stuff. Suddenly, we observed a piece of hardware unfamiliar to us, a dowel screw. There were threads, but no heads. Again we were perplexed. At that point I had to go back to work. When I got to the library, I did what I do best. I researched and found a short video on the Internet illustrating dowel-screw-techniques. I called Kelly to report. It turns out that the dowel screw requires a hammer instead of a screwdriver. This was good because screwing can get monotonous and banging is a nice change of pace. When I got off work and returned to the wood project, Kelly was almost done. I tightened a few screws and we moved the entertainment center into place. We tossed the TV and VCR on, added a few decorative items, and (alleluia) it did not fall apart. Maybe there was a little wobble to it, but the door hinges worked perfectly. As usual, the library had come to the rescue. We can also rescue you from reading monotony this week with the new book by Danielle Steel, "Ransom." Outside the gates of a California prison, Peter Morgan is released after four long years and vows to redeem himself in the eyes of the young daughters he left behind. Simultaneously, Carl Waters, a convicted murderer, is set on the path of freedom with him. That night, 300 miles south in San Francisco, police detective Ted Lee comes home to a silent house. Across town, in an exclusive Pacific Heights neighborhood, Fernanda Barnes tries to shield her three children from the panic rising within her. Four months after her husband’s death, faces a mountain of debt she cannot repay, a world destroyed, and a marriage lost. Within weeks, the lives of these people will collide. For Fernanda, whose life had been graced by security, success, and stunning wealth, the death of her husband was already too much to bear. Then a devastating crime rocks her family to its core and brings Detective Ted Lee into her life. A man of unshakable integrity, Lee will try to save Fernanda’s family from a terrifying fate. Special Notice: Pre-School Story Hour will be every Friday for eight weeks beginning at 10 a.m. March 12. Children ages 4-5 are invited to join the fun with stories, songs, movies, and artwork. Pre-registration is required so call us at 449-5040 to sign up.
